Cold and Flu and Kidmin

Oh happy day off! Today is Monday, and as I sit here enjoying a cup of hot tea, by a pumpkin spice candle, I am reminded that it's fall! Which means I get to bake, and everything tastes better! Sweaters and boots, and kids coming to church in puffy coats, looking like the stars of A Christmas Story! They're like little ministry marshmallows, so cute. I love this time of year!!

And then the harsh reminder that this also means cold and flu season, which seems to be just a bit scarier each year with whatever special illness decides to wreak havoc on our country and sense of safety as parents. Wouldn't it be awesome if those puffy coats gave off a mist of lysol whenever they were squished? I may be on to something here!

As a kids ministry leader, I realize just how many kids we come in contact with and just how often. Pair this with the understanding that the average child has between 6-8 colds a year, and you realize your immune system is probably working overtime. 

As I started to update some documents, I was working on our illness policy, and couldn't help but start to research ebola and other various illnesses. As I did, I learned that we were a bit outdated in our policy and have updated it, so I thought I might share. 

Why does any of this matter? It's just a runny nose, right? I believe this subject is important, it all comes back to how we minister to families. As parents come to church, especially those who visit, they want to know their children are safe and in great care. Most parents may not love the idea of being called back if Jr. is running a fever, but at the same time, most appreciate the effort to keep everyone healthy, especially with the best interest of kids at heart. 

As we come into the cold season, make sure your parents know that you have an illness policy (if you don't, well you should), the next step is to tell them why you have it, because you love their children and want to see them happy and healthy at church...and your workers too! And lastly, enforce it! Steps 1 and 2 make this possible. Yesterday I was working checkin when a child told me they had been throwing up at bed time, but felt better now. As I reminded mom of our policy, she understood and we didn't send her child to class. I got to call today and she is doing much better, and we will see her Sunday! This is a hands on example of being prepared makes for a good outcome, mom appreciated our concern and happily followed the procedure. 

Here are 10 ways to make sure you are ready for the coming months:
1. Have a policy in place
2. Make sure your rooms are being sanitized regularly
3. Learn to love Lysol. It kills everything! We spray in between sanitizing days
4. Tell parents when it's ok to return or stay home (green runny nose, fever or vomiting within 24 hours, and cover lice in this as well)
5. Post it! Policies are pointless if nobody knows them. 
6. Train it, make sure your staff knows and enforces the policy. It's for their health too!
7. Equip them! Make sure you have gloves, hand sanitizer and antibacterial soap in your rooms. We realize kids get sick when away from home too. If a child is looking a little feverish, we have forehead thermometers on hand to check. In most instances they want mom or dad at this point anyway. If a fever is present, we page parents. 
8. Encourage health, remind your staff that drinking water and a good diet strengthens their system
9. Provide options, while we do not allow children to come sick, we realize some parents are going to come anyway, they can sit in the televised areas with their child, but we do not allow sick kids in the classrooms. 
10. Have backup plans. I would love to say our teachers never get sick, but they do. And this policy counts for them as well, we love them and hope they are there, but if ill we want them to stay home and rest. This time of year, making sure we beef up the on call list helps teachers know they can be absent without leaving anyone in a bind if they are sick. 

I hope you find this useful! Have a happy healthy fall, and enjoy something pumpkin flavored!

What's your special need?

It's the end of September! THE END!! How did this happen? Every once and a while I stop by Starbucks, soak up their wifi and do a little writing. The crazy morning traffic around me is music to my ears, and quite frankly, it's people watching heaven.

This morning, I am sitting in said place, tucked into a corner with my "oh, so boring" black coffee. It is the first rain, and people here are fascinating. Where I live, central California, we are in a drought. Yesterday I was in a sundress and sandals and it was a sunny, almost 90 degree day. Today, pouring! Dark, gloomy and cold. I love it! We Californian's don't quite get it quickly, I have seen everything from wool trench coats to shorts and sandals. While it's funny, I am one of them with my open toe shoes. Ha!! In denial, I suppose.

So why am I sitting here writing? And why am I sharing all this (other than the obvious fascination)? This last week I taught a class on special needs at my annual training conference, and I loved it. I am in no way an expert, just a kids ministry leader who believes it's my job to create a successful environment for kids to learn about Jesus, every kid. And with that calling, comes research, work, and lessons learned.

At the beginning of my session I had someone tell me "I am seeing what this is all about, I think people need to go where they can be served with severe needs, otherwise the majority of kids just have discipline issues". Pardon? Let me say, I asked this individual if it was okay to use this very teachable moment...and don't judge to quickly, there's still a session in there ;)

This leader resembled some of the very old school teachers and volunteers I have worked with in the past. They aren't mean or uncompassionate, they simply don't understand, and as we have educated them, they wholeheartedly jump on board.  So this leader, while I will never be an expert in this ever changing area, is going to attempt to share her heart with you, and hopefully you find it useful in kids ministry.

First, did you know...
1 in every 68 kids in the US are on the autistic spectrum
1 in ever 691 babies born has down syndrome
1 in every 10 US kids have ADHD
1 in every 13 kids has a life threatening food allergy

I don't know about you, but those stats catch my eye! I remember when you MIGHT meet someone with down syndrome, or what is now identified as autism, but it was rare (not to give my age away) but we are watching these numbers climb on a regular basis now, and the church better keep up.  Why? Because we are missing these families! Parents who have kids with special needs will either stay home or alternate Sundays at best while keeping kids home. These kids never get to church....did you hear that? It should make your heart sink! For the church, it's not about the why, or the how. Let's leave that to the specialists! The scriptures tell us that we were handcrafted by our creator, all different, all unique, and with very different needs. I have a hard time believing that any of this was in error.

Psalm 139:13 For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother's womb.

As I spoke, I could see that leaders face change, we were called to spread the gospel and minister to kids. All of them. I like to remind people, we all have special needs. Yes you! Sitting here as I type, I don't have milk in my coffee because I am allergic to dairy, I am against a wall because people behind me causes anxiety (not kidding). I asked the people in my session to raise their hand for various needs and as they did, I reminded them we all have them. Don't get me wrong, we will never be equipped to do it all in one place, again why our differences are beautiful, but if we all do what we can, we can cover some serious ground. Here are 5 things we have tried to improve how we respond to the children and families in our church with special needs. 

1. Know your population - for us, we had to learn what needs we had. We have a strong population of kids with ADHD, Autism and food allergies. 

2. Train your workers - they don't need to have a degree, but the simple awareness that this is a growing population and a few triggers and response guidelines takes out the fear of the unknown. 

3. Asses your space, and decide your response - in our ministry, this looks like a buddy system. We have volunteers who buddy with kids and attend class with them. These volunteers are there to be a friend, to guide and help them be successful in the classroom with their peers while allowing the teacher to focus. This allows a relationship to happen with the parents, and as they bond, the buddy learns how to respond to the needs of the children in the most successful way. (every child with special needs is different!)

4. Share the vision - your congregation, all of them, need to know. Whether you decide on a classroom or a buddy system, there are always those that have a calling for this area that you know nothing about. Teaching or kids ministry in general might not be their thing, but they once had a relative that missed out because of needs like these. These people are woven into your congregation, and they are gems! Share that vision with all ages! Our buddies range from 16 years old to 60 years old and are the sweetest to watch!

5. Set your boundaries, and go! - While I would love to say "bring all kids of all needs" I have to remember that safety counts. We decided to start with kids 0-8 years old, and have since gone up as kids have gotten older. Set some parameters that you are equipped to handle, and get started. Just remember to be open to growth and development, because as these families are ministered to, more will come. Moms and dads getting to simply go to church becomes the sweetest Sunday sight. 

Lastly, diagnoses. This is the question I am most asked about, "how do you point them out"? Well, I don't. We simply invite, we invite parents to tell us if their child might need a buddy, and I personally try to ask every new parent, its a general question for us. Remember, we all have some level of special needs. On our registration cards we ask about food allergies and safety issues, and whether a child has special needs. When the fear of difference is turned into a realization that we all have special needs, it helps. Again, it's not about diagnosing a child, it's about creating a safe, fun, nurturing atmosphere that we can teach them about Jesus in. 

As I brought the session to a wrap, that leader simply walked up to me with the warmest smile and said "loud and clear....I have work to do"! I cannot wait to hear about how he is led to work with the kids in his church that are currently staying home. 

What do you do for your ministry in this area?

Beautiful Scars - Revisited

This week I have been preparing a training talk for a group of leaders.  I always begin speaking to adults with the same intro, "My name is Heidi Hensley and I am a children's ministry leader, there are three things you should know before we begin. 1. I will over explain words and details (kids love details) 2. I may ask you to race to our passages of scripture 3. If you participate well, I may throw candy." Of course this always is quite entertaining to say, but they roar in laughter when I actually do toss the first snickers bar. I love what I do, I (we) are called to shape and mold future generations, presidents, teachers, pastors and parents......spiritually. Our "job" in children's ministry is to bring Jesus into a child's world. I take what I do very seriously and am daily humbled that Jesus sees me as an individual capable of introducing children to Him.

I had originally planned on talking about how we as leaders have these canvases to work with. Often children are hearing the gospel for the first time, and so many see kids as a blank canvas who just needs Jesus' colors. I once had a Sr. pastor friend tell me "you're job is easier, the world hasn't gotten them yet", which in some ways affirmed the fresh canvas theory. Don't you love those moments that you have an absolute outline in your head of what you will be saying, and it translates completely different?

As I started working, I picked up a file to put it back in my drawer, out of it slid a report that I had to make to child protective services. I put it away and slowly realized that while my heart was heavy for that child, it wasn't shocked. This is sadly, something that we see more and more. As I went back to work, I just couldn't describe kids as a pretty canvas the world hasn't "gotten to" yet.  The kids we work with, they have scars, and if I am classifying them as unhurt, how will they ever know what to do with those scars.

Did you know, child abuse occurs at every socioeconomic level, across ethnic and cultural lines, within all religions and at all levels of education? About 30% of abused and neglected children will later abuse their own children, continuing the horrible cycle of abuse. The adults that my pastor friend was speaking of was missing one detail. The wounded adults that he was ministering too, well many of their wounds had happened as children.

Everything from divorce, molestation, lack of parent participation in life, physical abuse, bullying, learning disorders to speech impediments, they all leave marks on our canvas. Don't get me wrong, there are also beautiful marks of love on those canvases too! So what do we teach them? Typically we as Christians teach that Jesus paints that canvas white. He takes our sins and throws them as far as the east is from the west... I believe this, we are forgiven! So what about the remains of the sin, the scars? This is typically where the child begins to grow and gets frustrated as they approach adulthood that the residual effects or consequences of sin haven't just disappeared.

Jesus could have chosen to raise from the dead that third day and have returned un-scarred, but He didn't! His scars were visible, they were remains of hate and sin, and yet we see them as some of the most beautiful marks. Children need to know that their sins are forgiven, but they also need to be taught that the lasting effects on their life can be used to glorify God.

So with that idea, my canvas when I start my talk will be dirty and marked up with what the world has tossed at our kids instead of white. And I will hopefully be able to do a visual of Jesus letting those shine through to glorify Him as He forgives.

As a leader I challenge you to look away from those descriptions of the perfect child, from the perfect home, with the great grades, it's a different world. Take a look at your ministry kids this Sunday, maybe they need to hear that God is capable of using their scars for His purpose.

Bible Memorization

As I prepare for D62014 and look back on the thoughts from years prior, I found this. I believe with all my heart that we cannot ever embed enough scripture into a child. Sadly, I have heard people say that it isn't as important as I feel it is. Some have the opinion that we should only introduce what they can fully process in scripture.  While the goal is to teach them the meaning, value, and understanding of all the passages they learn, I realize some kids will learn a verse for points or a candy (I know I learned stuff for candy, and probably still would). II personally believe that the verse is hidden in a child's heart and can be accessed and recalled by the holy spirit later in life or whenever needed.


What is your take on this subject, how do you implement memorization in your kids ministry? And what is the coolest method you have ever used?


Happy Monday All!!

Let's process this together!


Heidi

Salvation: leading kids to Christ

Salvation: Leading kids to Christ

Teaching kids about Jesus is something that I love, getting to introduce Him to their world and see them form their thoughts about God, church and faith is one of the things I love most about what I do. But as a Children's ministry leader, I also recognize that this is in fact what I do. Our team is comfortable having conversations about salvation and baptism on a kid level and answering all their questions. But what about the parent or grandparent who fully understands salvation and baptism for themselves, but has a hard time getting it to the level of a kindergartner? Or what about the parents who might still be learning this information for themselves? 

This month we will look at salvation discussions that can happen in the home. While we know they hear it at church, we want to know our families are also prepared to talk to and even pray with their kids.  Praying a prayer of salvation with our ministry kids is amazing, but the ability to share that moment as a parent is a memory that is a treasure. 

Most kids with a church background know that:
1. God created everything
2. Jesus is God's son
3. Jesus died on the cross for our sins
4. That we cannot experience heaven or grace without Jesus

It is in the next area that kids have the basic understanding, but need to know that we must ask to be forgiven, and make a decision to commit our lives to following God. The place I often see a lack of understanding of kids, is the knowledge that there must be a time they have decided to follow Jesus. Many kids think that they were born this way, since they have Christian parents and are growing up in the church. I love to ask kids when they were saved, and hear about that experience. When they start with "I have always been a Christian" I know we need to talk. One of the key moments of salvation is repentance, we must acknowledge that we are sinners, and no matter how many times we go to church our how great our behavior, we must admit this before God and ask for salvation. I love to teach this with a gift, I have a kid hold it out to give it to me. And I tell them that it's mine (while refusing to take it) but insisting it belongs to me. This helps them see that salvation is freely given to those who believe, but we must choose to accept it. The beauty in this is the ability to teach that there will be times we mess up and need to ask forgiveness, for a child who didn't do that in the first place, this doesn't make sense. 

Another area of confusion for kids is when they are simply given a prayer to repeat and then left to go about their life, it communicates that this was an action, not a lifelong commitment. So how do we teach kids that salvation is more than a repeated prayer? They need to hear it, and see it.  Below I have included some ways to get the conversations going in your home. Maybe you will find that your kids are more spiritually mature and understood than even you know! Maybe you will find there are some things they need more help understanding. And maybe you might be able to pray with your child as they come to a full understanding of God's grace through a discussion with you. (how exciting!)

Testimony Time: Your kids may know you to be a Christian, but have they heard your testimony? Spend a week sharing these! Maybe around a dinner table, allow one person a night to tell their story. How they came to know Jesus, where were you when you prayed? Who was with you? What God has done for you since that time? And don't forget to share the relationship you have with Him now. Kids love to know these things about their parents!

Verses to know: As we know, salvation doesn't stop. Once we have given our life to Jesus, we are to share that with others. It's important that kids know that too. One way to help kids (and adults) prepare to share their faith is to equip them with the too
ls to do so. Here are some very important verses that you can learn as a family this month to strengthen those sharing muscles. (Matthew 8:8-12; Matthew 19:25-26;  Romans 3:8; and Romans 10:9-10)

If you find your self in a position to lead a child to Christ, don't over complicate it. Salvation is intended to be simple, as simple as A,B,C's. A brief discussion of making sure they understand that they Admit that they are a sinner, and this separates them from God. Believe that Jesus paid God's price for their sin by dying on the cross. Confess and repent of their sin and come to Jesus by faith. And Decide to live for Him. Some kids just don't know how to start, when you bow to pray, ask them if they want your help with the words or if they are ok praying on their own. Most kids will formulate the sweetest prayers on their own once they have a full understanding of what they need to do. And if they need help, that is ok too. 

I would love to hear of some great family discussions this month!

Teaching Families to Worship

            
As we unpack what worship is, it is important that we understand that worship is about God; it has nothing to do with us. More than being a part of the congregation or singing, worship is what we were created to do. Teaching kids that worship is a constant motion within us that doesn’t cease can help them better understand that it is more about our relationship with Christ and less about actions.  Worship is our inner (and sometimes outer) response to God that displays our reverence, honor, respect, love and joy for Him. 

Worship begins with salvation. When we can humbly come to accept Jesus and the gift of eternal life we begin to worship Him for loving us, the debt He paid, and accepting us into His kingdom. This form of worship is personal, and can only be truly expressed by a transformed heart.

·       If your kids have prayed the prayer of salvation, encourage them to tell you what God has done for them. And help them identify that their joy and love in these words is representative of their worship for Him.

The Bible has many scriptures about worshipping God with others. Worship within you is very important, but worship as a family and church is too. Colossians 3:16 says “Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly, teaching and admonishing one another in all wisdom, singing psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, with thankfulness in your hearts to God.” Coming together to praise, learn and encourage each other are all things we do as worship to God.

·       Help your kids understand why we come together, and then prepare. Arriving at church late and rushed can throw off the day and most often attitudes. Get to church on time; consider grabbing something from the café and having a few minutes to talk before kids go to class.

As parents, we can teach our kids to be mindful of worship. Kids need to know that they can worship God anywhere, at any time, in any circumstance. We also need to remember that worship happens in the good and hard times of life. Psalm 34:3 says, “Oh magnify the Lord with me and let us exalt His name forever.”

·       Encourage your family to take a mental note of things that are in their day. Things like, a beautiful day, being at school, God’s continual care as we travel etc. Over dinner ask what they noticed. Kids (and parents too) will begin to see the creation around them differently and can be encouraged to worship God for it.

In January we focused on prayer, continuing with that article, remind kids that prayer is also a form of worship. Teaching them a few more ways to pray like:  “God you are great because… I worship you because….” Will help them put worship into words. As you do this, read through some of the Psalms to see how others spoke praises to God. Taking in God’s word and reflecting on the scriptures is a form of worship too.

·      Read a Psalm a day as a family.

How is your radio? Music is an amazing tool for worship! We all know the song selection at church glorifies God, but what about the car? Or the house? Encourage kids to sing and listen to music as worship.  Finding music everyone enjoys and making a playlist for the car is a way to get the whole family singing along.

·       Let kids choose some music. There are great bands with every sound for worship, look online or at the Bible bookstore and let kids make a selection for their use.  Be willing to let them play it in the car or when chores are being done, involvement in this choice will keep them motivated.

Lastly, giving is worship. Giving God our everything, our time, our talents, and even our tithe, are all acts of worship. Teaching kids to give through serving and through financial stewardship will lay the foundation for them to understand that these are acts of faith that God will provide and worship for what he has provided.

·       More than likely you are already serving others in some capacity at church. Verbalize why you do this, many kids know their parents serve as a teacher or sing in the choir, but do they know why you do it? Once explained, encourage kids to find ways to serve as well, helping them identify spiritual gifts that can be used to worship God.

Use these small steps in the month of March to focus on all the many ways of worship. 

Beyond Background Checks

If you attended this session at CPC, thank you! You made it so much fun.

Below you will find the slide show as promised. If you didn't attend the session, you can get a copy of it on the incm website and use these notes as tips.

Remember, what we do requires us keeping kids safe. A safe loving, well thought out atmosphere allows families to go to church together and grow without worrying about safety.

Here is the link to my volunteer application as well.

Ready, Set, CPC!

What a week! Have you ever gone into an intense week of life with your exact plan mapped out, only to discover that it wasn't going to look anything like you planned?

As I started this week, I had intended to have some fun (since it was in fact a vacation) and get to share tons about CPC East! As we arrived at Disney, I became keenly aware of just how tired I was. My family had been running as hard (if not harder) than myself… and we needed a break! Thankfully, I took it! My husband and I ran all over Disney laughing and cutting up with our boys and we simply exhaled.

We did get to teach a couple breakouts, which was the intention, and do the Saturday morning coaching session. So, while I must apologize as a blogger for my lack of…..well, blogging, I can pass on to you a couple valuable lessons from CPC East! And hopefully you will be joining us at CPC West where you can cash them in! I will be there, with my team, and will be blogging. (seriously!)

At CPC East I caught myself needing to exhale, and simply be reminded that ministry is NEVER done. As a mom of a kid that will be a college student in the fall, I can tell you the time goes by quick!

Don't assume that I just skipped town and left tasks (ha!) I am thankful that by nature I am organized, my "work ahead" mentality allows me to set things down and rest from time to time. And this week as a leader, I was able to watch my family play, eat ridiculous things dipped in caramel and have moments of quiet to get closer to God and my family.

As I watched the fellow leaders at CPC, I wondered what state of mind they were in, sitting in the foyer many were on the phone and I was overhearing work talk from home. For some I spied them early in the morning out by the lake for what seemed to be their quiet time. (what can I say, I'm a people watcher)

My question to you leader, is what do you do to get conference ready? Do you come to CPC with a loaded mind that can't fit anything else in? Or do you go with your desk left clean at home and a brain ready to absorb? CPC is a place for many to relight a fire, to find fellowship among those that we share experiences in ministry with, and for some it can be a last hope in ministry as they seek God.

Here is what I am challenging us (including myself) to do before CPC West, ready?

1. Clean your desk - tie up all those loose ends, return those calls, all those little tedious tasks that consume our minds when we lay down at night. Just get them off your plate!

2. Get your programs covered - while ministry emergencies and issues do come up, make sure you are well staffed and your teachers have everything they need for any programming you may miss.

3. Make a wish list - Make a list of at least 10 things you expect to get out of CPC. Things like ministry questions answered, a contact who has expertise in a certain area etc.

4. Make an appointment with yourself - this is a great time as a leader to have a moment of quiet prayer and self assessment. For me, it has become my yearly self review.  It's also a way to find rest, a simple 30 minutes alone with yourself and God can make a huge difference.

5. Pray! - Go online and download the speaker list. Pray over those names and breakouts and sessions. Leaders like me appreciate it,,, I know I simply want to be used by God, and having people partner in prayer for that is awesome!

6. Leave a clean house - Well, not literally, but if you do literally…bonus points! Make sure your spouse and kids are good to go! When I come to CPC with my team, to work, I love to get a new movie and a special dinner for them. Happy homes :)

7. Schedule a coaching session - this year you will be allowed to schedule a coaching session at the end of the conference with the breakout presenters. This is an awesome opportunity! Take advantage of this free leadership training peice. 

8. Prepare to come, and have fun!! - bring your funny bone, and come ready to learn,
fellowship, worship and laugh as we grow stronger as spiritual leaders!

I hope to see you there!!

Kids That Pray

This month the focus is prayer. If you haven't read last week's post "Families that Pray" I encourage you to do so. Last week's post was designed to use at home with families. This week we will discuss it from a leadership perspective.

Like most Children's Ministry Leaders, we all hope that every child goes home to a place that during the week they are ministered to. Families that invest in one another and parents that are highly involved in the spiritual development of our ministry kids. But when reality sets in, we realize they don't all have that atmosphere. In fact I have some kids (as I am sure every other leader does too) that show up alone on Sundays and walk blocks to return home. For some of these kids I question whether or not their physical necessities are being provided as they tell me there was no breakfast and we do what we can to meet their physical and spiritual needs as well. 

We all have these heart wrenching cases that arrive weekly, so what about these kids? Who is teaching them that church and a relationship with Jesus is more than Sunday? Who is encouraging them to be in the word and to pray? I once had a friend tell me "Teaching them the books of the Bible seems irrelevant when all they want is something to eat". I understand the statement, but I disagree, we don't have to choose between physical and spiritual investment. These kids need an extra touch, at least in my opinion. In this blog I will attempt to provide leaders with tips to create a strategic plan that assists kids with or without at home support to begin to "own" their faith, something I am very passionate about.

The first step is to not assume anything. As we all know, kids are not books we can judge by a cover.  They may or may not have spiritual support in the home regardless of their appearance or church involvement. In kids church we set the stage by announcing to kids, "If you need help with a reading plan or a praying plan, come talk to us". While them having a solid home foundation is our desire, at the end of the day, our relationship with Jesus is up to us individually.  So whether you have a child with a strong support system or a child with no system at all, these tips can be used, and most by the child alone. 

1. Jesus and Me. Do your kids realize that their relationship with Jesus is theirs? It's not contingent on their parents involvement. When kids understand this, they are more inclined to invest in their own relationship. The understanding that Jesus is THIER savior, and not simply a family friend that you creates a relationship they were born into can be an iconic moment for how kids respond to the gospel. 

2. Prayer is anytime. Challenge your kids church kids to call on Jesus on their own. A simple short "Jesus please help me do my best on this test" or "in this game" teaches them opportunities to call on Him. Creating a list of four or five situational prayers gets this into their DNA and habit and creates an active prayer life for kids. Here is the list I use, kids are encouraged add to it but it is a great simple starting point. 

• Jesus, please help me do my best on this test. 
• Jesus, help me to be a good friend and make right choices. (recess bell)
• Jesus, please keep our family safe as we start our week. (Monday prayer)
• Jesus, thank you for a day of school and friends. (when the dismissal bell rings)
• Jesus, please help me do my best today. (when the starting bell rings at school)

The mind works in amazing ways. Using triggers like school bells as prayer reminders will be something that stays with them for years. I know it has for me. This was something I was taught to do as a kid at Northside Christian Academy in the first grade, and to this day a school bell prompts me to whisper a prayer. Only now it's for my kids as they run onto campus.

For the child without at home support, we need to remember that nobody is really teaching them the elements of prayer other than what they get on Sunday. A simple paper that says ACTS, helps them learn. One of my favorite things is when kids return to church and show me their ACTS prayer paper. It is simply a piece of paper, folded into 4 (creating 4 boxes) placing A,C,T,S, in each box. They stand for adoration, confession, thanksgiving, supplication. For the kids I use: Adore, Confess, Thanks, Supply. They can write new things in each box as they pray during the week. A super simple template can be made with little explanations of each word for them to take. 

Prayer is communication, and as a kid for whatever reason I thought that I needed to be qualified to do the communicating. Public prayer was actually a long time fear for me because of this misconception, so creating ways for kids to understand that it is simply how we connect and communicate with our heavenly Father is very important to me. 

I would love to hear other approaches and ideas out there. 

6 steps to a smooth new year

As we round out 2013, yes we only have 2 months of it left, it's time to put your planning hat on! Whether you have a team of staff, or it's just you, there are a few steps that can make your new year a little easier. Here are a few tips that can get you pointed in the right "organized" direction. As an example I will use the Harvest Carnival.

1. Calendar your year - while I'm sure this is done for most already, it's key to get the dates on a visible calendar. This gives you an idea of how much you're doing and allows for a bird's eye view of potential conflict and flow.  Ex. Harvest Carnival, October 31st. - connects to the invite for Christmas events.

2. List the elements - Once you have everything on your calendar, a list can be made of elements needed to complete those tasks. My list often includes things like: publicity; design; recruitment; room reservations; training and appreciation. This will of course be based on what the task is.
Ex. design publicity, recruit volunteers...

3. Work backwards - all of the elements can now be added to your calendar as you start at the event and work backwards. Ex. design publicity - August 1st (this now becomes my deadline)

4. Go mobile - There is nothing worse than a well planned year that disappears! All of this info is done and plugged into my electronic calendar for 3 reasons. 1. If my paper calendar is lost; I have a backup (yes.. I love and still use my paper calendar) 2. I can set reminders; A cell phone buzz to keep you on task just works! 3. I can share it - my administrative assistant can see as well as other leaders I share with.

5. Dream a little - It is once all of this is done that I can see what needs updating; to be eliminated; or where we have room to do other things. Tasks 1-4 are usually done for the next year by November 1st; this allows me a couple months to set new goals, make ministry changes (or prepare to) that I have been praying about; as well as cast vision.

6. Claim your gold Stewardship star - as we all know, things are cheaper in the off season. If I know that I will need 400 paper visors for a July event in January, I can buy them on the end of season "summer clearance" sales rather than top dollar with overnight shipping in June. We have seen ministry dollars stretch as a result of this. The key is to keep organized and label things.

 I encourage you to plan well and as far in advance as you can. We all know that God changes plans from time to time, so maintaining the flexibility to accept that while being a good steward of the time, budget and talent you have been entrusted with is the key. I hope you plan a fierce new year, and hold it very loosely. Sometimes we as leaders like to maintain a death-grip on our work, forgetting that our savior can make it more spectacular than we ever could or imagined if we will just hand it to Him.

Christmas for Families

Family ministry, children's ministry, Christmas!! How do they work together? As a Children and Family leader I have been trying to figure out the right mix for years. I have come to the conclusion that there is no ONE right mix. It takes knowing the culture of your families and the design of your church, blend that with what the economy is doing and sprinkle with a little hectic scheduling and you may find the formula.

I have personally come to learn that families (at least ours) want 3 things for Christmas.

1. To make memories with their kids

• They don't want everyone separated out, if they all have to be there, they want to be together
• Memories that can allow parents a moment to disciple their kids and teach them Christmas

2. They don't want another thing to go to

• In the busiest time of year, there are already to few days to make it all happen. So while I love the idea of a potluck and ornament making day, my families just don't have room.

3. They want relevant ways to make Christmas about Jesus for their kids 

• Parents are our best teachers. Let's equip them to do the job right!

So after processing the above ideas I decided to step back a little. We kept our Parents Night Out, a night that parents can shop without the kids and the kids have a great time with us. This happens by tradition on the first Friday each December. 

After that, parents are encouraged to use the advent guide to celebrate at home with their families. This alone is an awesome way to celebrate Christmas all month. But in addition to that, in the midst of shopping and decorating, life application opportunities arise. Parents are awesome at leading their kids in this way, sometimes they just need an idea. 

For the month of December we simply focus each week on a different thing that shares the true Christmas spirit. There are no sign ups, no meetings, and no time commitments. The entire family can participate and parents lead.

Week 1 we focused on compassion. While the stable and manger weren't optimal (or at least we see it that way) they were a gift, a man giving what he had out of compassion. Families were simply encouraged to pack up extra blankets and coats as the winter weather set in and hand them out as they were in town and see the need. (We are in California, so cold weather sets in early December) My kids still love to do this at the age of 11 and 17. 

Week 2 I am calling "random", showing love to complete strangers is something we are called to do. But we are also called to love our neighbors. Our children see us come and go every day, and in most neighborhoods we don't even know who we live around. We are encouraging families to do a random act of kindness in their neighborhood. Bake a treat, take candy canes, or even hand out Christmas cards.  Personally, we sock our neighbors. It's a stocking that gets filled with treats and we try to get it passed to as many homes as possible before Christmas. 

D6 2013 - Main Event Info

@heidimhensley  -  #d62013  -  livestream

I am in Louisville for the D6 Conference and having a ball with the social media team. 

 Join me for notes, questions, and watch via live stream with the links above.

We have a correction, all sessions are according to Eastern Time. 

Improving Child Security - Guest Post from KidCheck

Our friends at KidCheck support our efforts in children's ministry in a great way. While their check in system is outstanding, there are multiple areas of security that need to be covered for Kids in any kind of ministry, care, or organization. I am happy to pass along to you a well done video about improving our child security. If you have not checked them out, you can do so at KidCheck.com

Sharing your ministry vision

 If you follow my blog, you will know that I am mostly a writer of everything children and family ministry, with a few pieces on general leadership. However, when it comes to vision casting I truly believe this blog is relevant in many forms.

Anyone in leadership of a business, family, ministry or organization will have to cast a vision at some point. Why is vision casting necessary? The answer to this question alone may very well guide you to the how. If you answer the "why" with something that sounds like this: "To build and equip the body of Christ to continue the work of spreading the gospel", then I think you will get some good tools here. If your answer is "Because pastor doesn't want kids in the service, and I may lose my mind", I have some tips for you too!

In children's ministry we are always needing to cast vision, in fact I don't think this process ever stops. We need parents, teachers, and fellow ministry workers to be able to see the goal with us, to make it happen.  As leaders, everything we want to see accomplished requires the buy in of others, this is what will give your vision feet over time.

So where do you start? Here are some basic tips to assist in casting your vision.

1. Find out your Sr. Pastor's vision for your ministry, and get behind it. While I am sure there will be variations based on your style, you are most likely to attain your goal with his support. And you have your first buy in! After all, it was his idea. (wink wink!)

2. Make sure your vision is not a task. (go ahead, read it again) Your vision should be an end result that can be backed by scripture, not a "to do list" that any person in or outside the church could do. Does the success of the vision produce a mobilized servant of Jesus?

3. Let them see it. For example; this summer we revamped some of the things we do with our summer campers. Our world is crazy and I felt God's leading to reassure kids that He is with them. Instead of telling the counselors that we needed more Bible study or delegating a task, I reminded them of the things that had taken place in our world and showed them how it affects children. The training became a conversation of how this affects us spiritually and how we can teach them to rely on God in all the different ways we interact. The vision I was seeing, was never spoken to them, the key was to share the need and they saw the vision for themselves.

4. Let them own it. Those counselors mentioned above, they are actually concluding the last week of our program as I write this blog. I have seen love, tears, new bonds, and passion this summer in ministry. They were able to take the ideas from that day and the tools we gave them to have a summer of us all working toward one mark. They were able to own a piece of this ministry, and leave their fingerprint. If your vision is always just your vision, you were unsuccessful.

5. Celebrate! When you have reached your goal, celebrate this team. Those core people who saw your heart and came alongside you as they shared this vision will most likely be people who will stand with you during many more experiences in ministry.

There are times in ministry I can honestly say that I thought I was on the right track, I thought I was pursuing a direction for all the right reasons. The willingness to step back and assess whether this is my vision or God's has been a lesson well learned. Having people in our lives to assist or be a voice of reason is something I believe God intended. Acts 2:17 talks about "the old men dreaming dreams, and the young seeing visions".  I think all ministry leaders should get with someone who has had a few years ahead of them and talk ministry, I can guarantee that you will be inspired!

Why object lessons are awesome

Object lessons and kids, they just go together. I will even venture to say that they work well with adults too. We could go into all the mathematical and scientific reasons why, but I would need you to be in the  room with a live object lesson to make that interesting.

There are many ways to illustrate a Bible lesson to kids, many churches use felt, or puppets or even skits. While these are common illustrations that can be effective, I have personally always favored the object lesson. Here are a few reasons they work, and how and when to use them.

Why does it work: (Jesus used object lessons, but here are a few reasons anyway)

1. Kids are natural bayesian logic thinkers. This means they have the natural ability to take past events and formulate a probable outcome. For some things in life, like math and basic decision making this is a good thing.  So if you put an object lesson in front of them, they're hooked. Most kids have minds that start working over time to reason out what you are doing in front of them, and they are captured until the end of the lesson.

2. It's interactive, whether or not you call on a volunteer, most object lessons require asking questions. Personally, having a child up holding something and a couple peers actually performing the lesson with my guidance is my preference. My friend Roger Fields often says the words "can I get a volunteer" are golden in children's ministry, and I totally agree. Kids learn when they can get their hands on it.

3. It can be inexpensive. I will be honest, the first church I led children's ministry at didn't have a kidmin budget. I wrote my own lessons and had the option of a color page that could line the floor board of the car, or an object lesson. So throughout the week I thought of different ways I could illustrate the lesson using things in my house. Everything from teaching the trinity with steam, ice, and water to a lamp and an egg to illustrate faith.  It can be a very inexpensive, effective, and sometimes edible tool!

How to make sure your object lessons don't stink.
1. Practice! Don't lie there in bed on Saturday night and think through your object lesson and assume it will work. Let's face it, you're asking for disaster! Practice your object lesson a couple times, even use it on your own kids to see if it connects.

2. Prepare! There is nothing worse than showing up on Sunday with the assumption that there is oil in the church kitchen for your lesson and learning that it's gone. Make sure you have all your pieces and they are measured to your needs. This also speaks to the excitement, when kids enter the room, have it ready and they will be excited to see what is coming.

3. Use verses, make sure you start and end with the Biblical tie in. An awesome object lesson can become just a cool piece of entertainment if you don't connect it. My favorite thing to do is use them to connect Biblical principals to life application. Otherwise, kids go home and the "what did you learn" conversation becomes "I learned how to boil water" instead of "I learned all about the trinity...".

Object lessons are great, there are several sites that offer ideas including Pinterest (which is a kidmin must). Be prepared and know that it may change as you go, maybe even plan a couple alternate endings. Use new people in your ministry too, this is a great time to get those volunteers who are being mentored a chance to get comfortable in front of the kids in a more comfortable setting. Even send an outline home with the parents! Object lessons are a great tool in the home to get families talking.

Want to go to D6 Conference? FREE?

Yes! You read that correctly! 

I will be giving away two tickets to D6 2013 Conference in Louisville. 

(conference tickets only)

As many of you know, I am a huge advocate of equipping leaders. Last year (and this year) I will be serving as part of the social media team at D6, this is an outstanding conference that has something for everyone in ministry. The prime focus is families, but there are tools for women's ministry, men's ministry, kid's ministry and more. One of the best methods of training I have ever received (and continue to receive) is the learning experiences others. So for a fun way to give these tickets away, I am asking that you tell me the best piece of kid's ministry or family ministry advice in no more than 25 words that you didn't learn in seminary.

It can be fun, logistical, spiritual, etc. These will be used for a ministry project later, so be creative!

D6 is in Louisville, October 16th - 18th
For more information on the content and amazing speaker line up click here.

To enter to win, add a comment on this blog post of your 25 words or less. I will pull a random winner on the 4th of July....just to keep with the "FREE" theme! The winner will be announced at 10:00 AM PST both on the blog and twitter!

I can't wait to see your input!



 

Are we giving kids enough?

I recently found myself having a conversation about the Columbine Massacre, a situation that still terrifies every parent to this day. After a radio host had mentioned the Sandy Hook School shooting, my son asked a few questions and made the comment similar to this, "That stuff wasn't really bad when you were a kid, huh mom?". Of course your first instinct is to protect your child and try to explain things softer than they actually are, but I felt a need to take a breath and have a conversation about it.

I mentioned the school shooting that actually took place in the city where we live, and I grew up in 1989.  The gunman fired 106 rounds in three minutes killing five children and wounding thirty others including one teacher. While this man had a history with Cleveland school, his acts were based on hatred and racism.  I then mentioned Columbine, which both of my kids have vaguely heard of. There have been many books that have come from this tragedy that have made amazing changes in our schools regarding bullying. 

Somehow our conversation turned towards the kids who were killed, and I mentioned one of the girls that had confirmed her belief in Jesus just before she was killed.  I know that two of the girls were very strong in their faith, but specifically Cassie Bernall who had said "yes" when the gunman asked her "do you still believe in your God?" just before he killed her. 
Honestly, this was a very hard conversation to have but I am thankful for where it lead as we talked about standing for our faith, and knowing what you believe. Our conversation ended as we arrived home and our day went on.

I have returned to that conversation many times in my mind. Part of me would love to ask the parents of Cassie Bernall and Rachel Scott what they did in their home to grow these two faith bound girls that stood firm that day. Maybe their pastor or youth pastor would have things to tell. 

As a leader of Children's Ministry I often worry so much about making things fun, decorations, and details, that while important, may not have eternal value. This has caused me to ask myself this question: Am I equipping kids to have a solid enough relationship with Christ that they can (and will) stand for their faith if challenged to do so? 

God's word tells us that some of us will be challenged for our faith, some even until death. While that is a massive lump in the throat to swallow, especially when we think of our kids, it is one that I think is important.  

As we watch the world we live in look more like the prophecies we read, how are we equipping the next generation to carry on the faith? And stand for it at all costs should that be asked of them?

As I run and play Bible memory games with these kids, and maybe run them through a slime machine this summer I personally plan on using teaching moments to give them tools to continue to build a solid relationship with Jesus as well as giving parents at home tools to continue that growth.